In vino veritas – in wine there is truth

wineBenson, as we know, has been around for a few years and in that time has collected a wealth of wine related quotes. Some, he claims, he was around to hear when they were said!

Here is a small selection of the ones he can remember. If you have any other great quotes
and can help prompt Bensons old and addled memory please send them via
[email protected] or join up on the wine forum by clicking on the button on the left
of the screen and dropping some in there.


“It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend; ones
present or future thirst; the excellence of the wine; or any other reason.”
Latin saying

“God in his goodness sent the grapes, to cheer both great and small; little fools will drink
to much, and great fools not at all”

“The best use of bad wine is to drive away poor relations”
French proverb

It is better to hide ignorance, but it is hard to do this when we relax over wine.”
Heraclitus 540-480BC On the Universe

“When men drink, then they are rich and successful and win lawsuits and are happy and
help there friends. Quick, bring me a beaker of win, so that I may wet my mind and say
something cleaver.”
Aristophanes 450-385BC Knights

“The wine urges me on, the bewitching wine, which sets even a wise man to singing and to
laughing gently and rouses him up to dance and brings forth words which were better
Homer The Odyssey

“The great evil of wine is that it first seizes the feet, it is a crafty wrestler”
Titus Maccius 190BC

“Up to the age of forty eating is beneficial. After forty, drinking”
The Talmud 200BC

“If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good”
Cardinal Richelieu

“A man cannot make him laugh – but that’s no marvel; he drinks no wine.”
Shakespeare. Henry IV Part 2

“He who loves not wine, women and song remains a fool his whole life long”
Martin Luther 1777

“God made only water, man made wine”
Victor Hugo 1856

“From wine what sudden friendships springs!”
John Gray 1685-1732 Fables ptII

“Wine is the drink of the gods, milk the drink of babies, tea the drink of women and water
the drink of beasts”
John Stuart Blackie

“ Let us have wine and women, mirth and laughter,
Sermons and soda-water the day after”
Byron Don Juan

“I have enjoyed great health at a great age, because everyday since I can remember I have
consumed a bottle of wine. Except when I have not felt well. Then I have consumed two.”
A Bishop of Seville

“Wine is bottled poetry”
Robert Louis Stevenson

“I wonder what vintners buy on half so precious as the stuff they sell”
Omar Khayyam

“ Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages”
Louis Pasteur

“And Noah he often said to his wife when he sat down to dine,
“I don’t care where the water goes if it doesn’t get into the wine””
Gilbert Keith Chesterton 1874-1936 Wine and Water

“I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink; that’s the one thing
i’m indebted to her for”
W.C. Fields Never Give a Sucker an Even Break

“During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled
to live on food and water for several days”
Cuthbert J. Twillie(W.C. Fields) My Little Chickadee

“ I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as
good as there going to feel all day”
Frank Sinatra

“Hey Man, I’m drinking wine, eating cheese and catching some rays”
Oddball (Donald Sutherland) Kellys Heros

“A bottle of wine begs to be shared; I have never met a miserly wine lover”
Clifton Fadiman N.Y. Times 8/02/1987

“Now this is an amusing little Chardonnay … with surprising perky personality, until it is
consumed in large quantities, at which point it seems to display some alarming emotional
Shoe cartoon caption

“Alcohol – the cause of, and solution to all of life’s problems”
Homer Simpson

“I can certainly see that you know your wine. Most of the guest who stay here wouldn’t
know the difference between Bordeaux and Claret”
Basily Fawlty (John Cleese) Fawlty Towers

“Recommended serving instructions: Open bottle when ready to serve”
From an Italian wine producer who will remain nameless!

“Well they were given the grapes that go ripe in the sun
That loosen the screws at the back of the tongue”
Four Horsemen, London Calling (the best album in the world ever according to Benson) The Clash

The Life and Times of Benson

Benson is working on his life story at the momment. A life full of heroic deeds, motor racing, winter sports, crime, fine wines and a few tall stories. Not bad for a butler from Birmingham who is only two feet tall.

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